Last day in hospital 9-24: how and why I got here

Monday morning and still in the hospital but my time to leave Is scheduled for 1 pm today. Writing from my phone so a bit tricky, but will do my best. In sum: huge thank you to  anyone who has donated red blood cells or platelets!!! If you to do something good for cancer patients: donate! I went through a few bags this weekend and wouldn't be writing this without them. Still no signs of any car T action, and thankfully no more signs of any stomach bleeding. The cause of the stomach bleed is thought to be from the chemotherapy and low platelets combo. The chemo I took destroys any dividing cells. Well the cells of the stomach, esophagus and mouth turn over more than other cells in your body so the chemo kills/irritates these cells.  typically these are places where you have issues after chemotherapy (mouth sores, nausea, etc). The combination of wounded stomach cells and low platelets meant some routine oozing turned into a fairly large bleeding event and that is why I came in to the emergency room on Wednesday night. Although the first time I had a bleeding event that led to puking-up blood it was scary and unsettling, weirdly this last time I knew I would be OK and I just needed to get to the hospital soon but not call-an-ambulance type of rush. The actual realization that I had a GI bleed was a little amusing to me and will be a mental image I take with me for a long time. After waking up in bed and feeling nauseous, I tried to wait it out, couldn't so I thought some fresh air would be nice. It was raining but still cooler than inside so I walked out to the front porch. Lit by the street lights and a nice drizzle, it was a nice scene. But only 5 seconds later I felt the urge to vom, but I was too far from the edge and I couldn't make it in time. Hand went up to my mouth to block some vom before I could reach the front balcony. I saw that my puke was dark and a lot more than I had for dinner, but to verify I had to bring my hand up. Covered in blood, glistening in the moonlight/streetlight with rain as a backdrop, this was the closest I'd ever come to feeling like a werewolf. It was also the closest to a horror movie cause some blood got on the porch, I stepped in some inadvertently and failed to rinse it all off in rain. I squeeked my way to the shower, knowing there might be some bloody footprints in our hall in the morning. And interestingly, likely no evidence will be left outside--the rain will wash it away-- my werewolf moment now being the perfect crime. While washing my feet in the tub, I called to Bree to get her awake. I came into the bedroom, Bree and I were sitting on the bed I looked over to her and decided is unsafe for me to drive because I might get lightheaded but didn't really make sense for her to drive and have to stay up all night and then we would have to take Alpen with us, and get him ready, this would all take time. So I did what any millennial would do and called Uber. 

I just hoped for a good driver but I knew I was in trouble when the driver called me I walked outside and I couldn't see where he was. I clearly marked my driveway on the map.  How hard can it be to wait there? Uber is tricky cause I've found you don't necessarily have to be a good driver and you don't have to know you're way around the city at all--there are apps for that. When I saw his tail lights halfway down our street i became concerned and then when he did a six point turn to accomplish turning around, I thought “Uh oh.” But what can you do when your calling an Uber in the middle of the night on a Wednesday? Main thing was I wanted to make sure he was awake, I searched hard for a coffee cup in the cab, no dice, but through some light conversation he proved he was wake enough. Good thing about a midnight trip to the hospital is there is no traffic. So we had that going for us. But it wasn't all smooth sailing cause it was raining and I-5 was down to one lane, so what shoulda been a breeze, was more of a jerky, nervous ride through drizzle and traffic cones, all while focusing on not puking up blood in his SUV. That would surely tank my rating. He made no comments on our destination of the medical center which is always interesting to me, but I suppose as a driver you don't really want to know and could be impolite to ask. So I instructed him around to the ER drop off circle and said “have a good night.”


The ER was expecting me since I called before I left. I got vitals and then another urge to puke (blood is extremely irritating to GI cells so can't really fight it with drugs or mental toughness) so I vomited up another bit, not as much as before but probably around 12 oz. (they always ask how much, so it's good to pay a little attention). Then the docs want to see it to confirm how much blood how many clots etc. so I carried my green eme bag around to my room then gave it to the nurse went I got into the bed. He then set it on the counter and later spilled it into the trash. Classic. Met the docs, started some red blood cell infusions. Eventually got moved to where there was an open room which was the oncology ICU. The rooms were big and the nurses experienced. I was extremely tired as my hematocrit dipped to 16 at its low point and I had barely slept that night. Pushed through a foggy morning of questions and blood draws and blood products. Woke up in the afternoon, couldn't eat or drink anything cause I was going to be scoped that evening. My dad visited. Anesthesia team came and brought me downstairs, got scoped, they sprayed something that helps the inflamed stomach lining. No more bleeding. Over the weekend the goal has been to get me to a platelet count of 50,000. We accomplish this on Saturday and since then it seems I am holding onto my platelets fairly well. I am approved for discharge. From now on we are keeping the platelets above 30,000 in hopes of preventing any more bleeding episodes. Life will return to how it was before the hospital: waiting for signs of a CAR t activity.